top of page
Writer's pictureEmilce Suarez-Lipton

Endings And New Beginnings: Death And Re-birth. Part 2: Homecoming




One Friday afternoon during meditation, something unexpected happened. As I was channeling my Higher Consciousness and I was speaking the words coming through me in English and Spanish, I felt energy increasing in intensity. Then, I began to chant and to say words that did not make sense. It sounded like gibberish. Like some weird dialect. The chanting and movement of my hands during channeling was not unusual. I’d been doing this for a while. What was different was this bizarre dialect and increasing heat felt in the body. 


I moved my hands and fingers in accordance with the rythm and/or intonation of my voice. My mind observing it all happening thought “Okay, this is weird, but also kind of cool so let’s see how it goes”. The more I did it, the more I welcomed it. The more I welcomed it, the more I trusted it. The more I trusted it, the better it felt. I got hot, I felt a current of energy, a gentle wave of electricity moving through the center of my body. My head was tingling and I would not stop speaking this way. I took brief breaks because my throat began to hurt, but I felt like I wanted to speak more. 


The best way I can describe this is that it felt as though parts of my Core Self that were in silence for a long time, were finally set free and there was no more holding back. Although the “words” did not make sense and I sounded and looked weird, it all also felt familiar and natural somehow. These Core Self parts of me wanted to express themselves. “They” felt like different parts, but they were all me. The energy of it was coming from my chest and belly and all that area was vibrating. About an hour and half passed and only then, I felt like I wanted to take a rest. I felt expansive. I felt loved. 


 As I reflected on the experience, I remembered that a few weeks prior, I  had a session with a singer and sound healer who spoke what some call Language of Light. I thought  it was weird and definitely woo-woo, but also intriguing.  When I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and listened to her speaking this way, I felt very relaxed and in a lovely expansive state. It felt like a soothing sound bath. I had the same paradoxical reaction, “this is weird, but also very familiar and lovely”. I did not understand why it felt that way until I began to speak it that Friday afternoon. 


A few times, I have reflected on this blog about my process of detoxifying myself from distorted views of spirituality I grew up with, particularly from Catholism, but also from Spiritual frameworks and paradigms about the Divine as something to seek outside, something to achieve or to get from external sources. I have also re-evaluated the notion that being spiritual meant to be postive at all times. As I speak this Language of Light or as I like to call it “My sacred language” I palpably feel my Divine Light within me. My chest and belly vibrate gently, my temperature gently rises and I feel peace and a sense of wholeness, I did not experience as clearly before. I feel like this is my first language, a form of expression that precedes Spanish. 


As weird as this may sound, this sacred expression feels ancient, ancestral, galactic and magical. It feels as though all of these aspects and dimensions of me that are timeless gather together in a loving homecoming in my core and come through my voice and hand’s movement. It helps me clarify what I am feeling. It helps me ground and bring myself back to balance. 


Now, I use my sacred language every day. It flows naturally every time I close my eyes and tune into my inner wisdom. It comes through when I'm cooking, when I am watering my plants or petting my dog. It comes through when I am trying to communicate something and I need clarity to articulate exactly what I want to communicate. It comes through in the shower and when I wake up as well as during my bedtime routine. It is the expression of my Core Self, My higher consciousness, the essence of who I am.  

It feels so natural that I feel comfortable bringing it up during my work with clients with their permission and when it feels appropriate and aligned. Thus far, all who have heard me speak this way, welcome it and appreciate it.  


Feeling this homecoming does not mean I am immune to negativity. It actually makes me more sensitive to energy, so I feel things more deeply, yet I am also able to come back home to my heart and to a more neutral state. 


My sense is that throughout our lifetime, we experience multiple deaths and re-births. Evolution and transformation is inevitable as are endings and new beginnings. The challenges continue, the journey is long, but all feels much better when there is an expansive Core Self, a home within to come back to; and it certainly feels amazing to share the energy of this expansive state with others. 


My sense is that this energy of endings and new beginnings; of dying and homecoming is happening at a collective and individual level for many. It just shows up in different ways. Many are making shifts, taking big and sometimes unexpected leaps. Some are turning into themselves more, or perhaps connecting more with others. Some are co-creating from their heart more and exploring different spaces and ways of being inspired. Some are also reckoning, questioning, revisiting and reviewing parts of themselves and of their history. To me it is all part of the same process. A thread I see in some of my clients and people in my personal life is this invitation to integrate what has been perceived as opposite or that has been viewed in only one way. 


The integration of the masculine and the feminine, the physical and the non physical, life and death, dark and light, positive and negative. The invitation to re-visit experiences and memories and see them from different angles, noticing other layers, other players or dimensions that were not noticed, nor appreciated before. And the invitation to do all of this with as much self love, self compassion and self forgiveness as possible, so that we can offer the same to others. 


Thank you so much for reading all of this. My wish is that you receive the same invitation to notice what may be ending, what may be dying and what is birthing or wanting to be birthed within and through you. I would love it if you shared here or privately. In Love and Gratitude.


9 views0 comments

Comentários


bottom of page